Summer,,Agape Love..do we have it?

Summer...another season. I love summer too. I have noticed that I blog that except for the fall, I love all 3 other seasons. I am debating on deleting my blog page. Don't have much in this summer season to write about. My teens are growing faster and faster, it has been a lot of changes. I would say this past year has held leaps of changes in my children now teens, Some of the changes are wonderful some very difficult.

But my hope and strength is in the Lord, my joy is also in the Lord! I know the things that are wonderful are from Him and the difficult adjustments He is in.

It is amazing to me now that the teen years are here, how "easy" the younger years were!!

My children are wonderful teens, but there are a lot of issues they face, decisions they have to make, that as they are making them, it can just make your heart ache. And all you can do as their parent is talk as much as they will listen and most of all Pray...pray..pray trust and believe.

That overwhelming Love you feel for that sweet newborn only grows deeper as they grow. So when they hurt or make decisions you feel could harm them..you hurt...and worry. Until you are reminded again and again. The Lord is faithful to keep those children. He loves them more then we do. Gosh what a Love that is, because I love them so very much.

I am currently reading and studying a book for a class we are in called. "Breaking Intimidation..by John Bevere. So much good stuff in this book. The book teaches so much about our heart, what is truly rooted deep in our heart and how that comes out when we are pressed by a spirit of fear and intimidation.. It explains how we will know the Love we have for the Lord or self love by our response..wow..."Thank You Lord for always providing teachings and tools to grow closer to you.." One of the things I am seeking is the be rooted in a true Love for Jesus. Love for the Lord that gives up our desires, our will, is the Love that does not fear, does not fall to intimidation and timidity because those things grasps us when we love ourselves the most. When the Lord is our first and true Love, then we do not respond to intimidation and fear the way we do when our root is more of a love for ourselves....hmmmm...there it is again.

It is by grace and the Holy Spirit we have the agape love. That is my focus right now, show me Lord where I love myself more than you, and in your grace fill me with your spirit to be able to Love you with an agape love.

I look forward to the Lord's grace and compassion to fill me with that Agape love for Him. The one who loved me first! The one who is the cause for so many of my smiles, my joy inside and peace of mind.

Hold tight to Him wherever you are in your journey to know the Lord deeper.

Hugs

Great is His Faithfulness

Great is His Faithfulness...Forever reigning King, Lord Almighty

I want to say great is the Lord's faithfulness!

We are only experiencing a glimpse of our King now, and that glimpse really is more than we can take in.

I just want to shout from the mountain tops, {so, I will blog instead}...that I am forever changed by the Lord.

When we ask to be "undone" , never satisfied without His presence, He answers.

It may be a journey, but He answers. I love this life of being His daughter who is desperate for him, I love closing my eyes and seeing a picture that I am a pawn on a chest board, and it is ok to not be able to move unless the hand who created me moves me. Strategically moving, holding,

. And is ok, because He is our everything.

Winter and Spring, new seasons

I love Spring! I come alive in the spring air, the fresh breeze, to me it is almost as if I am in a worship service when I feel the spring air. I feel the Lord's love for us through the beauty of the spring season. My spirit is alert, and I have really great conversations with the Lord just sitting or walking in the spring air.

But,,this year I am "resting" in the winter. I am finding that for me this season of winter has been a needed time of resting in the Lord, pulling away with the Lord. I think we or I can get too cluttered, too many concerns, relationships, all good stuff, but it can be distracting from the solid time with the Lord. Winter has given me time to refocus, pull myself in, in a sense.

So, I don't know if this makes sense, But winter for me has come this year as a regrouping, refilling, refocusing time. And a time of rest. I must have needed the rest.

I now have a new appreciation for winter and how the Lord uses season, literally, seasons of nature to speak to us, minister us and move us forward.

But oh...I can't wait for spring! Can't wait to go shop for flowers, hanging baskets, one of my most favorite things to do. This year I am already thinking of a serious herb garden!

I originally started this post sharing my struggle to accept the truth my children are growing, and trully the days of them here as in the past are ending. I really can't express the heart ache and sadness this has been. I know other moms know what I mean. I heard of it, listen to other women talk about it, but honestly, never conceived how very difficult it would be.

I have come through that time over the past months to a place of acceptance and trust. I still hurt and just never want this season of my life over. But I am also able to begin to picture that even tho I have loved, loved,,,LOVED the past season of being a mother with of babies, a mother of toddlers, mother of school age children. And the current season of teens becoming young adults. The Lord loves me enough to help hold my heart and fill the void.

Now my focus is to just let go of the longing for it not to end, and be the mother of prayer for my teens that I need to be. And it is going to take all I have to do that! This is time of devout intercession for my children. The teen years are fragile, wonderful and scary. The enemy of our soul realizes teens are vulnerable. But the Lord we serve is far above and able to keep them strong in Him.
I am going into this spring and summer seasons with my focus to rejoice, enjoy and be on my knees for my kids! Thankful the grieving letting go has eased up so i can do just that.

I should name my blog,

The motherhood journey,,phase 3? ...maybe

Love you my friends who take the time to read my rambling thoughts!

Love You Lord who loved me first